Whenever I find myself in a conversation about interpersonal difficulties (“my boss is a screamer,” “I can’t get my boyfriend to ever be on time”) I always ask, “have you ever heard of the enneagram? I get one of four responses:
1. No. Please move on.
2. Isn’t that some kind of personality test? That stuff is all bullshit.
3. Yes, I’m a six.
4. I haven’t. Please tell me all about it.
My favorite is person #4. Here is what I tell them.
The Enneagram is a pitch-perfect illustration of your own and others’ blind spots, of what we do over and over to cause our own problems. The Enneagram is the best system I ever heard of to explain the differences between people—in a way that increases self-knowledge, understanding, and patience–and teaches how to relate to others without difficulty. It is an extraordinary system of personality typing. It is extremely subtle yet totally useful in real life.
I tell them that “ennea” is the Greek prefix for nine and the system defines nine personality types. Each is simply called by its number. (People have made up names for each point on the Enneagram, but I think they’re more confusing than helpful, so I’m just going to stick with numbers). At this point their eyes narrow. Is this person going to try and pigeonhole me, they wonder. I CAN’T BE DEFINED BY ONE NUMBER, they say to themselves. YES YOU CAN, I say to myself.
Click here to read the rest of my completely unauthorized thoughts on the subject.
Click here for a super detailed Excel spreadsheet depicting aspects of the Enneagram.
5 responses so far ↓
1 Leslie // Dec 28, 2007 at 7:17 pm
How do we figure out our type? Do we just read the descriptions? Or is there a test or something that can reveal one’s type?
2 susan // Jan 16, 2008 at 6:33 pm
Check out this post: http://www.susanpiver.com/2008/01/02/figuring-out-your-enneagram-number/
Let me know if you have questions!
3 Stacey // Jan 20, 2008 at 9:33 am
The enneagram is an amazing tool and I’ve been typed as a counterphobic 6. I have taken different tests and have come out as a 6 and a 3, but when I read about the types I’m convinced I’m a 6. When I read your “unauthorized thoughts” about a 6 I chuckled because I can definitely tell you all that can go wrong in a situation! I’m attending a weekend training in March with Clarence Thomson that I’m very much looking forward to.
I was introduced to this model by my husband, who has already studied with Clarence and it is very helpful to me in my life and my work. I wish everyone knew about and understood the enneagram! It’s helped me manage many relationships.
Thank you for posting about it.
4 susan // Jan 21, 2008 at 1:46 pm
I’d love to hear about your training in March. Is it about the enneagram in general or a particular aspect of it?
Thanks for being in touch and I also wish every understood the enneagram! Would make life a lot easier.
5 Karen // May 13, 2008 at 2:27 pm
I tried to click on the link http://www.susanpiver.com/2008/01/02/figuring-out-your-enneagram-number/ to figure out my number but received the message that the URL isn’t found on this server. How can I find out my number? Any help would be greatly appreciated!
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