Category — retreats & workshops

October 29, 2009

Today we are snowed in at Shambhala Mountain Center, an extraordinary Buddhist retreat center in the Colorado Rockies. This may be my very favorite spot on earth. I’m here for a week, teaching a meditation retreat for writers. When I look out my window, this is what I see.

It’s like the best writing situation ever. There is no cell phone reception. We are almost two hours from the nearest city of any size. We spend the day practicing meditation and writing and absolutely no one or nothing can interrupt us. In the evening we meet to hear someone read their work. The snowstorm only adds to the sense of being sheltered, hidden away, embraced, at peace. Each day is a deeper experience of relaxation, joy, and creativity.

This sounds good, no?! It is. However, I can’t help but notice that the more fun it is, the more my students cry. During meditation, I see people tearing up. When I give my little talks on creativity, some eyes well up. When people pull me aside to chat about this or that, before they can get any words out, they begin to cry.

It’s awesome.

Awesome because, in the Shambhala tradition, sadness is seen as a mark of warriorship. Chogyam Trungpa Rinpoche says that this tenderness is the first tip of fearlessness. You are not afraid to open yourself to the world and when you do, everything touches you. This is just how you are built.

When you taste your own gentle goodness, it can be quite frightening. If I had say, $10,000, for every time someone said to me, “Well all very well and good about this softness thing, but what happens when I get back to the real world?”, I’d be a millionaire. My friends. THIS is the real world. The real world is where people are kind to each other, help out in times of need, celebrate each other’s victories, and maintain a powerful sense of inner balance that enables them to maintain these qualities through good times and bad. That other place—the one built on speed, aggression, insecurity, and “me first,” do you really think that is the way we were born to act? I think not. Babies are born soft and open and loving, they don’t come out of the womb demanding better accommodations, hoarding away milk and toys from other babies, or giving people the finger in traffic jams because they’re in a hurry to get to a playdate. (Although that last one I’d kind of like to see.) That is the phony world, the one built on misconception after misconception about what is valuable, meaningful, and important. I mean, really.

So how does one return to the fake world without slipping right back in to old, bad habits? How do you protect your gentle, open heart so that it doesn’t get stomped?

The first thing to remember is that your heart only needs protecting if what you’re trying to build is a comfortable, threat-free life that shuts out whatever and whomever you don’t like. (Which is actually impossible, but don’t tell.) However, if what you’re after is a life of authenticity, wakefulness, joy, and deep connection with others, an open heart is your best friend. It is how you take the world in.

This doesn’t mean you need to walk around like a sap, being all hushed and new-agey and more blissed out than thou. A person with an open heart can be spotted in this way: They laugh hard. They cry a lot. They pretty much like themselves. They question themselves and experience doubt frequently. They get their feelings hurt. They are there for you in a crisis. They keep trying to love you and get you to love them back.

One reason people cry so much on retreat is because they glimpse this possibility and it is so incredibly touching and real. The trick is to stabilize your heart in the state of openness so that you can use it for good instead of being overwhelmed by your own sensitivity. It is possible to do this. A daily meditation practice really, really helps. I mean REALLY. In fact, I don’t know how one would practice openheartedness without it.

So I super-strongly suggest to my students that they continue to practice meditation in some reasonable way, like 20 minutes a day or 10 or 90, whatever they can do. And beyond this, I try to explain the three steps that can make their meditation more than an exercise in relaxation (not that there’s anything wrong with that), but a sacred declaration of aliveness and goodness. I write about them in my upcoming book, The Wisdom of a Broken Heart, and I’d like to share them with you now.

Before you do your spiritual practice:

1. Make offerings. When you walk into a shrine room of any religion, there are often flowers, candles, and incense. These are offerings. You can make a similar type of setup in your home, by creating a smaller version of a traditional shrine. Or you can simply place some fresh flowers next to a picture of someone or something you love and aspire to emulate. You can light a candle as an offering of warmth, light, and safety. And, when in doubt, the best offering is one you can always make, no matter where you are or how you feel and that is your own experience in the moment.

Before meditation, touch in with how it feels to be you right now. Maybe you feel great, crappy, or all of the above. Feel it. Offer it to whom or whatever you hold sacred by saying something like, “I offer exactly who I am right now to the highest wisdom and goodness I can imagine.” You don’t have to know exactly what this means, just rouse a sense of generosity.

2. Request blessings. It’s totally OK to ask the world to bless you. And who do you ask? If you are a Christian, you could ask Jesus. If you are Buddhist, you can ask for your teacher’s blessing. You can seek the blessings of magic if you are an Alchemist, of Gandhi if you’re a pacifist, of the earth if you’re a Pagan. The idea is to seek the blessings of your lineage.

What lineage do you belong to? Is it a religious tradition? Maybe so, maybe not. Maybe you’re of the lineage of poets or scientists, of painters, mothers, CEOs, crusaders, or lovers. Get a sense of your heart’s lineage and, in whatever way feels natural to you, request the blessings of that line.

After doing these two things, do your spiritual practice, whether it is meditation (hint, hint), journaling, hiking, or reading something uplifting.

3. Dedicate the merit. Once you have finished your practice, connect with whatever benefit you may have created for yourself through undertaking this practice. Once you have this felt sense, give it away. In whatever way feels natural for you, make the aspiration that the results of your practice could be used to also benefit others. This is very important. My beloved teacher, Sakyong Mipham, says that not dedicating the merit is like not hitting the “save” button on your word doc before shutting down.

So try these things. I wish for you the precious and potent tenderness that comes from acknowledging your own basic goodness.

From the bottom of my laughing, crying, cranky, needy, and deeply loving heart, Susan

Storm rages:

My cozy room:

Sun Over Marpa Point

Have been at SMC for a week, teaching a meditation retreat for writers. It’s been incredible–magical, sweet, tender, and a little nutty. As has been the weather. We’ve had sunshine and snowstorms, darkness and light… Enjoy…

Sunny first day on the mountaintop:

Our shrine room:

The Great Stupa of Dharmakaya:

Buddha hands in teaching mudra:

What it looked like when I walked out to get tea one morning:

Snow!

Snow!!

Teaching meditation and writing retreat for a week!

Hello to the creative artists out there.

Hello to those of you who wish to live authentically and deeply.

Hello to anyone out there who is confused as hell about what this means.

I’m talking to all of you, including myself.

About a month ago, I was on the phone with a close friend who was utterly confused by his own life. He had started on his adult path with a clear connection to his creativity and purpose. But now, 15 years on, with a lucrative profession and a beautiful family, he had gotten himself to a place where everything looked good on the outside but felt bad on the inside. For years he had been asking himself if he should he quit his job, move to a different town, etc. He thought long. He thought hard. One day he thought this and the next day he thought that. But nothing changed. When we last spoke, he had reached the end of his rope. He said, “I need advice. I can’t keep going in circles like this. I’m just not happy but I don’t know why or what to do. I need someone I trust to tell me what to do.”

Fortunately, I knew exactly who to refer him to. Himself.

I’m not talking about the agitated, childhood-neurotic, moralistic, affirmation-saying self. That self just kept plaguing him with thought after thought after thought, laying out hopeful scenarios followed by fearful ones, debating with him in the voices of his mother, father, best friend, favorite writers, and various television stars. I’m talking about the self that exists just beyond the fringe of discursive, conventional mind, the self who sees clearly, possesses extraordinary insight, knows the truth, and can be called upon in every moment to guide with wisdom—if only we can remember to ask.

This self automatically steps forward when we relax and stop thinking that the problems we think we have can be solved by thinking some more about them.

This self automatically steps forward when we step out of the discursive stream and, rather than allowing it to carry us, watch it rush by. This is what happens when you meditate. It is also what happens when you write.

These realizations lead me to create a retreat that combines meditation and writing. During this program we slow down, unhook from our conventional lives, rest the mind in meditation, and then write to discover who we are, what we think, and what we need to express. It is meant for anyone who wants to reconnect with his or her authentic self. It also happens to be a fantastic way for those who write to take a deep dive into an existing project or start a new one—but no writing (or meditation) experience is necessary to take advantage of this program and receive its gifts.

So I suggested to my friend that he stop thinking and instead relax his mind. I suggested that he go on a meditation retreat and let the raging river of thought settle into a cool, clear stream where what is settled at the bottom is as evident as that which floats on the surface. This is how one makes space for wisdom to arise. I wish this for him, and I wish it for you.

Please email me if you think you might be interested in attending such a retreat, but think you can’t meditate, would never dare to call yourself a writer, or your life would fall apart if you walked out of it for 3 or 7 days. We could have a discussion.

VERMONT
September 18 – 25
Authentic Inspiration
Barnet, VT
Karme Choling
Program Fee: $675
This price includes meals but does not include accommodations. To view scholarship and financial assistance resources, click here.

COLORADO
October 23 – 25, 2009
Meditation and Creativity
Red Feather Lakes, CO
Shambhala Mountain Center
Program fee: $315 – $595, including $155 tuition, depending on lodging. Price is all-inclusive.

October 23 – 29, 2009
Meditation and Creativity: An Extended Retreat with Susan Piver
Red Feather Lakes, CO
Shambhala Mountain Center
Program fee: $495 – $1,055, including $195 tuition, depending on lodging. Price is all-inclusive.

PAST PARTICIPANTS
I had not written anything in a long time. The Writers’ Retreat gave me the space, time, and inward focus to let creativity happen naturally. I hadn’t realized how much I had to say.  The meditation aspect of the retreat provided a peaceful structure where writing could be a pleasure once again instead of work.

Anne, Boston, Realtor

This course helped me integrate meditation skills such as serenity, focus, compassion, and insight into the areas of poetry and fiction. I am extremely grateful!

Brian, Ithaca, College Student

The growth I experienced in a few days was life changing.

Britta, NYC, Graphic Designer

I cannot recommend this writing and meditation retreat enough! Susan’s carefully considered practice schedule offers precisely the right balance of meditation and space in which to write. Her teaching style allows for full creative expression to unfold because she neither interferes with the writing process, nor does she abandon the writer to his or her own devices. The result is a profound deepening of the work of writing and the practice of meditation. I left with a much more sophisticated understanding of how these two practices are not only complimentary, but how meditation is crucial to the life of the writer. This is a very rare opportunity for anyone, indeed.

Crystal, NYC, Novelist

Susan Piver is very wise, intuitive, and insightful and has had great impact, with a very light touch.

Gil, St. Johnsbury, VT, Corporate Consultant

Susan is a caring, compassionate person whose presence, insights, and instructions made for a valuable week exploring meditation practice and writing.

Heather R, Albany, Travel Writer

I can’t imagine any way to improve this program because it was more than I could have asked for.

Kathy, Cleveland, Librarian

Emotionally moving, spiritually a gift, cathartic beyond my wildest imagination.

Miriam, Cambridge, Waitress

I’m teaching a Writers’ Retreat at the beautiful Shambhala Mountain Center in CO, Oct 23-29. Come for the weekend only (Oct 23-25) or the whole thing! It is very conducive to writing. No cell phone reception, no email! Just peace, quiet, and words. This program is built for you if you’ve ever said any (or all) of the following:

I know exactly what I want to write, I just haven’t written it down yet.

I have no idea what I want to write, but I just know (hope, fear) that I am a writer.

I’ve been working on this story/chapter/article for a long time and I’m completely stuck about where it’s all going.

Every time I sit down to write, I can’t think of what to say. But I know the story is in there.

I’ve been stuck in the middle of this book/chapter/article for __ days/months/years/lifetimes and I can’t seem to get it finished.

I have a deadline approaching and I haven’t even written one word! Or I did, but I hate it.

Every time I sit down to write ________ distracts me.

I don’t have time to write!!

This 6-minute video explains what the program is like:

The Shambhala Lodge: has about 30 rooms, some private, some semi-private, some dorm rooms

Private room, private bath interior

Sacred Studies Hall: Where some programs are held

Inside a program room.

Join me at Morgan’s Rock Hacienda & Ecolodge near Granada, Nicaragua from June 16-22 for a week of relaxation, writing, hiking, meditation, and exploring the beauty of Nicaragua.

Morgan’s Rock is more than just a hotel. It is a project of nature conservation, community development and reforestation offering Agro- and Ecotourism at its best. Morgan’s Rock is located at north of San Juan del Sur, in the department of Rivas, which lies just north of Guanacaste, Costa Rica. It’s south of the colonial city of Granada and about two hours and a half from the Nicaragua’s capital, Managua.

Because the economy is so rotten, the price just went down!

Single Package – $2725
Doubles Package – $2475 per person

Price includes:

* 6 nights accommodations at Morgan’s Rock
* All Meals
* Roundtrip Ground Transportation to and from Managua International Airport
* Guided Hikes
* Group Meditation Sessions with Susan
* Group Creative Writing Sessions with Susan
* Local School Tour
* Tree Planting & Reforestation Tour
* Local Artisan’s Tour
* Colonial City of Granada Tour

If you sign up before April 20, there is is a discount of $250 per person.

Here is our tenative schedule:

It’s going to be incredible. Morgan’s Rock is exceptionally peaceful, beautiful, and completely soulful. Click here for more info about the program. E-mail me with any questions.

What past participants have said about the Writers’ Retreats:

“Susan is a caring, compassionate person whose presence, insights, and instructions made for a valuable week exploring meditation practice and writing.”  –H.R.

“Susan Piver is very wise, intuitive, and insightful and has had great impact, with a very light touch.” –G.S.

“This course helped me integrate meditation skills such as serenity, focus, compassion, and insight into the areas of poetry and fiction. Susan had a great presence and created a well-balanced program of sitting, writing, and discussion. I am extremely grateful!” –B.S.

“Susan was a phenomenal teacher/facilitator: powerful, generous presence, skillful, inspiring, uplifting, an ally, and strong leader.”  –L.E.

“I can’t imagine any way to improve this program because it was more than I could have asked for.” –K.H

“The growth I experienced in five days was life changing.” –B.L.

“Emotionally moving, spiritually a gift, cathartic beyond my wildest imagination.” –M.M

I’m teaching a workshop based on my upcoming book, The Wisdom of a Broken Heart. It will take place May  15-17 at beautiful Karme Choling Shambhala Meditation Center in Barnet, VT.

In the Shambhala tradition, a broken heart, rather than a problem to be solved, is considered a remarkable opportunity to discover your innate spiritual warriorship. Only by plunging into the depths of your heart can you achieve the self-knowledge and genuine presence that are associated with wisdom and personal power. And when your heart is broken, you really have no choice. Your insides have been turned upside down and your deepest fears and concerns are no longer manageable. You can’t run and you can’t hide and so it is time to meet them.

This weekend program will gently introduce you to the skills needed to work with a broken heart – not to drive it away or tie it up with a bow, but to find the message of wisdom contained in this most difficult situation.

You will learn meditation, the practice of loving kindness, and several on-the-spot techniques to use throughout the day. In addition, we will:

• Discuss the wisdom aspect of painful emotions
• Contemplate one’s history with such emotions
• Shift the emphasis from finding love to offering it as a way to reclaim power
• Learn to stabilize your heart in a state of openness

Whether your heart was broken yesterday or years ago, the elements needed to tread this path are present. As we progress, you will discover that gentleness, fearlessness, and intelligence are marks of spiritual warriorship and that the dark power of heartbreak can introduce you to them. If you stay with your broken heart, it will surely lead you down the path to wisdom.

It’s not expensive–$275, not including housing. Click here for more info.

Here is an excerpt from the book and a bit more detail about the weekend:

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Thanks so much for joining my session this morning, “Conquering Fear, Gaining Peace.” I truly hope it was helpful and you’re feeling gentle (toward yourself), taking delight (in others), and feeling confident (about life).

To stay in touch, please sign up for my newsletter which goes out about once a month and includes tips, info, and articles about meditation, courage, creativity, loving kindness, all that good stuff.

I really enjoyed the session myself. Here’s what it looks like where I was sitting when we spoke. Snowstorm outside. Cozy inside.

Here are some of the resources and exercises we discussed today:

Meditation Instruction
Click here for the following guided audio practices:

The Practice of Tranquility (10 minutes)
The Practice of Tranquility (20 minutes)

Loving kindness Meditation (10 minutes)
Loving kindness Meditation (25 minutes)

An Article I Wrote About Fear

Check out my book

A Special Offer for Virtual Retreat Participants!

I’d like to offer you a three-session package of one-to-one phone coaching to help you learn meditation
and integrate the principles of gentleness, delight, and confidence into your daily life. This package is good for people who are:

•    Battling fear & anxiety
•    Want to feel joy!
•    Want to free their creativity
•    Wish to develop a more loving relationship to themselves
•    Wish to develop more loving relationships with others
•    Are going through a transition

This package includes three 50-minute phone coaching sessions, one a week for three weeks. It also includes a 30-minute follow up one month later, plus light e-mail exchange as needed during the entire period.

Normally $600, I’d like to offer it to Virtual Retreat participants for $450.

E-mail me for more info.

The On-the-Spot Techniques We Discussed Today

When you notice fear arising…

When you encounter someone angry…

Loving kindness in the world…

Our backyard right now…the perfect day for a retreat…

Please join me for a 45-minute teleconference on meditation, spirituality, and courage on Sunday, January 18th 11A Eastern/8am Pacific and learn about fearlessness during scary times. I’d love to meet you and even though it sounds super-heavy, it’s actually fun to talk about this stuff.

Look at me, I’m smiling! And it’s my job to think about these things all day long.

If you can’t make it, recordings will be available after the call.

www.comfortretreats.com/susan